When I first started my journey three years ago I was reading a book by Dr. Phil about weight loss and it said in it something that really helped put things into perspective for me and set me on my journey. “Either you do it or you don’t do it….either you sit and eat your chips and sit on your couch or you get up and do something about it.” Something so simple, so direct made so much sense.
2018 is here and in full swing. 17 days in and I had something happen that put things really into perspective and shinned that light that I used to have, that awareness that I need to keep in mind of how I must succeed. How I will succeed?
A coworker’s relative passed away this week from co-morbidities issues related to her weight. She was around 450 pounds. She was in her early 50’s. She had been wanting to have bariatric surgery but she didn’t make it. She had told a family member that she thought “she had waited too long” a few weeks ago. I didn’t know this woman but I am heartbroken that someone lost the good fight against this terrible disease of overeating and obesity.
I am scared. I have let myself go and thought so many times that I couldn’t do it. What I did before I did when I wasn’t working a full time job. I have lost my faith in God because I am tired of this being so hard!
I was looking back at the posts I had from my first months on this journey and how motivated I was. I remember it wasn’t always easy but I hadn’t given up and was fighting. I am back over 300 pounds, which I swore would never happen again, and the worst part of it is, I just didn’t care. I thought, well if it doesn’t get any higher……now I’m 312.
I can feel my days are numbered and I am losing this fight. I know that if I do not do something to ensure my future that I will be on that same track I fought so hard to get off of. I don’t want to die…I want to live and live a long and healthy life. I don’t want to be at the mercy of what I stuff in my face. I want to be free!